Systems Approach To Marriage Therapy

Many couples battle with relationship issues. In fact there are more husbands and wives experiencing relationship problems that they require help fixing than there are individuals battling with a lot of mental issues that are common in our community today.

Marriage is an important ingredient of a family's life in our society. Issues and challenges that the married couple is not able to handle themselves can result in unhappiness and divorce. When couples are miserable it also impacts their families and other people they are in contact with in a negative way. By utilizing a family systems approach to marriage counseling, pastors or therapists can help these couples solve their conflicts or emotional issues.

The family systems theory was created by Murray Bowen, MD, who was a psychiatrist and the theory is also labeled as the Bowen theory. The theory can potentially change the approach to treatment, not only within a family but also in the society as a whole.

The family systems approach is what laid the foundation for family therapy. One of the fundamental principles of family counseling is that a person's behavior affects their family and the whole environment, but is also influenced by their environment. So rather than focusing on one individual person, the focus is shifted to the whole family. However family systems counseling can be given to just one individual person. Family systems counseling is understood by the focus of the therapy model rather than the number of persons coming to counseling. In fact in most cases one individual who wishes to change how the family dynamics work is seeking counseling.

All families have their own rules that gradually adjust over time when the family members and their needs and wants are adjusting. These rules can be both unspoken and spoken.

In every family a variety of behavioral patterns are consistently found and the members of the family usually play certain roles. These behaviors are commonly repeated in a cyclic pattern, over and over again, until one of the family members is becoming aware of what is happening and decides that she/he wishes to change so the relationship can be healed. One example of such a cyclic pattern is a family where one member of the family is nagging and the other is withdrawing. This may cause the person that is nagging to be nagging even more, which again is just causing the other family member to withdraw. In family systems counseling, it is pointless trying to figure out who started the negative behavioral pattern or blame anyone. When one individual is made aware of the pattern and seeking to change her or his behavior, the other members of the family will respond to the change and thus the whole behavioral pattern will change.

Tina Hanson is blogging at Christian Marriage Counseling Info. To learn more about the family systems approach to marriage therapy